Friday, 28 September 2012


Another swimming lesson this morning and the McBaby is making great progress (did you think I was going to say 'waves'?) with swimming underwater and is really, really enjoying our half hour sessions every week.

I am enjoying it too, although I have to say there was something I most definitely did not enjoy this morning, and probably, neither did our classmates. McBaby, was it really necessary this morning to pull my swimming suit down to flash everyone?


Wednesday, 26 September 2012



1. Having a nosebleed all over the McBaby and taking ages to find the source of the blood!

2. For driving to Norwich for work and then discovering that I had two babyseats in the car, necessitating a last-minute taxi for MrM who dropped the McBaby at nursery and then got a taxi home to collect his car, before driving back to work again!

3. Not sending a spare pair of trousers to nursery, and the McBaby therefore having to wear a pink pair home with rabbits on them.

4. Forgetting to take a nappy with us when we went swimming. I had to borrow one. Oh the shame.

5. Calling the McBaby and MrM; "Jon, Dave, Simon". None of these names belongs to either of them.

6. Abandoning the McBaby to go and see my favourite band last night.

6a. While at (6), telling MrM that McBaby won't go to bed until 11.30pm. And then taking it as a personal insult upon my parenting when MrM managed to get him to sleep at 7pm.

7. For sending a video of the McBaby to You've Been Framed. I'll come back and apologise separately if it gets used...


Saturday, 22 September 2012

Princess Anne

MrM organised a wonderful event for the service to dedicate a new memorial to American airmen. Forty-nine crewmen were killed in two incidents in December 1944 - a glider crash and a mid-air collision above Greenham Common.

Guests to the service included Princess Anne, the local MP, the town's dignatories, and er....the McBaby and I.

I really wanted the McBaby to have had the experience, whether he remembers it or not, to find out about the Second World War and to meet veterans. This was a great idea as he charmed the people who were there, smiled at everyone, called the MP "daddy", and cooed and enjoyed himself. This great idea seemed more like a very bad idea when there was a minute's silence. How to keep a baby quiet for what seemed like the longest 60 seconds of my life? I know! I will stick my finger in his mouth - the result was this noise that you can hear in the first few seconds of the ITV report:

Wednesday, 19 September 2012

9 months today!

Nine months!

Longer out of the womb than in it!

Happy 3/4 birthday my little sweetheart! xxx

Thursday, 13 September 2012


Sometimes people need to be a bit more subtle than simply telling you what they're doing.

Like the time I spoke to a copper who was doing a speed check, wondering how many people he'd booked.

"Only a couple, it's more for reassuring the public that we're taking action really."

Similarly, the predicted illness that we thought the McBaby would get once he started nursery did indeed arrive with a vengence a couple of days ago. He can hardly breathe, his nose is blocked, he's got a horrible smoker's cough and he is not sleeping at all.

He also has a strange yellow tint on his nails, but fortunately I worked out that this was the remnants of the paint that he'd got all over himself during an art session at nursery yesterday.

This very ill baby became a very happy baby when we arrived at the doctor's surgery. Plenty of women to flirt with and a mummy to make look foolish.

I took him in, and the doctor seemed a bit impatient. He did examine him though when I said I wanted to know if he had a chest infection or not. The McBaby didn't enjoy this at all, and didn't enjoy being told that he was fine and then the doctor just saying the word "reassurance". As in, "I am reassuring you".

Don't reassure me!

Tell me what to do!

Don't patronise me - I KNOW that you can't visit me at night, I was simply saying that he might seem fine to you but he is genuinely unwell and unable to sleep.

And yes, DrX I've already given him Calpol!


Tuesday, 11 September 2012


The McBaby had his first paid-for swimming lesson this week - the first since I very thorough and enjoyable class with his aunt when he was four months old!

We headed to the pool at Elcot Park near Hungerford which is the location for our classes as the water is quite warm. In fact, it made me titter to myself, as I watched from the side as the McBaby got ready with his dad (a rare day off for MrM). While they were in the changing room, I put my toe in. It was like bath water.

Then the next lady came and did the same. "Ooh it's freezing."

Then, MrM with McBaby. "Oooh it's warm."

Then, the first lady's husband. "Oooh it's cold."

And so on....

The first lesson was about getting used to the water. He seemed a bit scared but did enjoy it. And not just dad, the McBaby liked it too.

The half-hour lesson went by in a flash. Or should that be "splash".

They swam underwater, the parents learned how to get in and the babies got used to sitting on the side and not being afraid of falling in.

So a great first lesson. Next week it's my turn to take him as MrM will be working. Looking at the other mums, my only concern is that how much weight I can lose before next week's session....


A wedding....

We spent the weekend down in Cornwall for the wedding of the year. In fact, the wedding of the decade. Close your eyes and picture the perfect English wedding. That is what this was like. A beautiful church, stunning bride, handsome groom, gorgeous weather, bunting and flowers, fudge, music, laughter. Amazing and so wonderful for the McBaby to spend time with his family.

This is what I learned:

-That a bowtie will stay on the McBaby for a maximum of 45 seconds.

-I have not been able to walk in heels since the birth. Or before. I got my heel stuck in the grate while walking down the aisle. Most unladylike.

-That my dad is the best speechmaker I've ever heard.

-How to brush a dog thanks to the McNephew

-That three gorgeous bridesmaids will emit enough beauty to hide the ugly one!

-That according to my cousin (from the Midlands), "Cornwall is in the south, isn't it? Near London?"

-That a wet dog will take away that new car smell.

-That I am AMAZING at air guitar

-That a three-year-old is better at re-inflating a bouncy castle than I am

-That if I drink enough, I will eat meat

-That I want to move to Cornwall....


Tuesday, 4 September 2012


How can it possibly, possibly be September already?

Wasn't it February about two minutes ago? I just can't believe that time is passing so quickly. I can't even tell you what I've been doing since the beginning of the year!

So, here we are in September and that means that I am back at work. I was actually meant to go back in July, but asked for an additional two months off because...well, see the third sentence of this post for details.

I'm back at work and that means that the McBaby is at nursery. He is settling in nicely and enjoyed a few hours there last week as a trial. MrM dropped him off yesterday and said one of them nearly cried, but didn't specify who, although I have an inkling...

So far, we're pleased with the way the nursery keeps him busy and reports back to us what he's been doing, what he's eaten and how is mood has been. But what's this about napping? The boy who will not nap during the day is sleeping for half an hour here and there at nursery! I do not pay for you to sleep McBaby! You can do that at home!

I'm only kidding! it's all good, except for the morning drop-off. It's horrible dropping off a little one. How do they know to make that face and those big puppy eyes? MrM picked him up yesterday and the McBaby was so excited that he laughed loudly, clapped his hands and talked all the way home. He then tried to climb up the stairs, such was his delight at being back at home.

However, when I picked him up, he was playing happily, then looked at me and burst into tears. Thanks for that.

When I dropped him off this morning, he was so pleased to see his little friend that he shouted very loudly, making the other boy cry. Is the rule that one person should be crying at all times?


Saturday, 1 September 2012

Kate Takes 5 listography - top 5 songs I grew up to!

What a great idea from Kate! her list is here:

My five are:

1. A new England by Kirsty MacColl. I love Kirsty and have done since I heard this, aged nine!

2. Whitney Houston (RIP) - I wanna dance with somebody

3. Whiskey in the Jar!!

4. Madonna, believe it or not! I used to love this song and recall specifically buying Smash Hits once because it had these words in it....

5. Elvis. I grew up on a strict Elvis diet! I think this one is my favourite.

Wow, what a great trip down Memory Lane (at the end of Cringeworthy Avenue). My 25-year long affair with the Levellers didn't start until I was in my teens, so you've been spared!