Apparently the inappropriate things that people say to you when you're pregnant continue once you've had the baby. I met my friend today (a mother of three girls - two of whom are twins) and moaned about the things that people say to me including today's selection:
Person 1: "Would you like me to be at the birth?"
Me: "That's a kind offer but I'm worried that I might swear at you without realising!"
Person 1: "You could perhaps try not to swear?"
Me: "Yes, I could! Good thinking!!"
Person 2 on 'chat': "I'm ringing you now."
Me - (9 months pregnant remember) - "My phone's upstairs. I'm not rushing up there as it always stops ringing when I get there."
Person 2: "Run, run!"
Person 3 - a friend who has greeted me thus every time she's seen me for the past few months: "You look MASSIVE!!!"
Person 4: "So do you know what it is yet?"
Me: "Interesting use of the word 'yet'. No, I'm not going to find out."
Person 4: "Is your nursery ready yet?"
Person 5 (a relative of MrM who previously asked me to find out if we were having a boy or girl so she could buy a baby hat in the appropriate colour): "Have you had the baby yet?"
Me: "I hand-on-heart hereby promise that I will call you when it's born. I will CALL you! Call YOU!"
But it won't end when the bean's here. My friend tells me that people constantly ask her if she's hoping for a boy next to "complete the set". Or they ask: "Were they conceived by IVF?" How that is anyone's business I don't know! Or "Are there twins in your family?" Or "are they identical?" Or "how do you tell them apart" - to which she replies, "by their poos."